shadowbird: (Paris)
We are here. Here in a place where I stand tall,where I can be strong and love someone who is strong, where I can walk in the bright sunlight and not be afraid, where I can stretch and breathe and grow and be. We are exhausted, but cheerful and motivated. We have good friends who love us. We have an amazing friend who made the mattress happen for us today so we didn't have to sleep on the floor a second night. That amazing friend comes back tomorrow with equally amazing folks who make up an elite moving and unpacking force. Life is good, people are generally pretty freaking awesome, and the universe is conspiring to shower us with blessings. Hell yeah and hallelujah. It's good to be home.
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shadowbird: (Default)
Just wanted to let people know that I'm feeling emotionally better today (although physically a bit sick--have tracked this down to a need for new glasses, for starters). I am also really enjoying being positive but a total pain in the ass to a certain Negative Nelly friend on Facebook. She's being a twitwit.
shadowbird: (other destinations)
I. Am. So. AWAKE.
Also, I love being able to snap out of disordered eating. I can't always do it, but I did it tonight and I feel so much better.
Good group, great diner, nice ride with Kathryn, now home. Tired, but awake. I somehow feel like tomorrow is the beginning of something.
In a better mood than usual for sure.
shadowbird: (mixed up)
Hello October, have some points of interest:
  • Grad school apps have been postponed while I figure out what it is I actually want to do, because I don't know.
  • I need a desk, and to make some personal physical space so I have room to work. On anything.
  • I really should clean in here today.
  • I've decided to do NaNoWriMo this year.
  • I had tea with [personal profile] oliviacirce  yesterday, and I'm so glad our orbits have crossed again.
  • Despite the seemingly inevitable melancholia, this is my favorite time of year.
  • I have been trying to be a better friend lately. I think it is working.
  • Yearning for something you used to have is not the same as yearning for someone who once had you. I am trying to learn this. It is exceedingly difficult.
shadowbird: (other destinations)
  • I have not yet done a Pi-Con wrap up, which makes it highly unlikely that I will actually do one, so for the record, it was freakin' awesome, I had a great time, and I now have a lion.
  • Speaking of the lion! His name is Aloysius, and he is the Lion of Chance. He was named by [livejournal.com profile] shadesong, and he has a collar of dice, and he helped with my shot today because I was having muscle tension of doom, and he is basically the rockingest lion ever. Pictures eventually.
  • I am back on www.sparkpeople.com, once again tracking my exercise and food intake. Here's hoping I can get back into some good habits.
  • I have been writing, a bit! I am thinking of retooling the Headvoices so that they're not a script, and tell a more coherent story. If anyone has thoughts on this, do comment! If you'd like to read them, they're tagged as "voice" here.
  • I am applying to Brooklyn College because they have a Master's program in French teaching for 7th-12th grade. This is exciting.
  • I have three (three! wow!) interviews lined up so far for tutoring gigs, on Monday and Tuesday of next week. Good vibes, prayers, thoughts, energy, incantations, etc. would be much appreciated.
  • I have been horrible at making plans to see people, mostly because I keep getting hit by the nap-hammer. HOWEVER! I got through today (a shot day, even!) with no nap, so hopefully I can stop sleeping so much extra.
  • Yay #Roombed.
I should really get to the non-electronic part of my day now. . .'night, gang.

shadowbird: (Default)
Busy busy weekend, full of potential. Busy busy week, with an empty apartment at the end. . .
I like that girl, you know the one. Yeah.
shadowbird: (Default)
And all shall be well, and all shall be well, and all shall be wonderfully well.
I missed my friends, both old and new.
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shadowbird: (other destinations)
For someone who's being accused (by my father) of being isolationist, I sure do have a ton of friends. The phone is always ringing, I can always find company, I never have to be alone unless I want to. This past week, I've had people with me on Wednesday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday. I have had more good conversations, face-to-face, in the past seven days than I had had in the three months prior. I've been having intimate encounters, slumber parties, heart-to-heart chats, movie-watching, intellectual debates, and gigglefests. I feel connected to the city and to people. I've been getting and giving support. I'm not feeling touch-deprived for the first time in I don't even know how long, and although I approach things with a healthy caution, I have no fear and very little self-doubt. I know what I need to do and most of how to do it, and I feel good about where I am and where I'm going.


I'm really, truly happy.
shadowbird: (NNY)
And no, this wasn't my show. So what. From Sondheim's Merrily We Roll Along:
We'll worry about it on Sunday!

We're opening doors, singing, "Here we are!"
We're filling up days on a dime.
That faraway shore's looking not too far.
We're following every star —
There's not enough time!

We're banging on doors, shouting, "Here again!"
We're risking it all on a dime.
That faraway shore's looking near again,
The only thing left is when,
We know we should count to ten —
We haven't got time!
We haven't got time!

Five hour panic attacks: bad. Friends: Good. Liz coming over today: Better. The rapid approach of a cheese fondue dinner and large doses of snuggling with my beloved Baroons: Best.
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shadowbird: (cunt)
It'd be [livejournal.com profile] kittydoll82 . Hands down. I have lyrics, and music, and A SPOT ON THE TC FLOAT FOR PRIDE.
Loooove to the Heather. Big time.
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shadowbird: (10 things)
I was gonna write a long bitchy post about traipsing over hell and creation to take a phonetics exam and how crappy I feel and how sore I now am and how things suck. But I decided to read my f-list first. And I found The Moxie Show.
Charli and Colin rock my socks on the rocks. And I bow down to the Queen of Alaska.
That is all.

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